‘Makeshift (A Queer Mass)’, Q&A with cast and crew

Can you tell us a little about the origins of Makeshift? What first inspired the idea for the play?

CHARLI: It mainly started as an idea to explore the idea of ritual and “mass” as performative forms but then it became a vessel for a much deeper of exploration of the themes of identity and religion. That became my final project, the thesis for my masters, asking the question, “How can I stage queer identity?”

The play is subtitled ‘A Queer Mass’. What does this phrase mean to you and how does it shape the theatrical experience?

CHARLI: The use of Catholic mass parts in the piece has always been really central to it. I think adaptation is a form of reclamation, and so adapting a Catholic mass to be queer and inclusive is a reclamation of the harm the church has notoriously done to marginalized communities. Instead of allowing that harm to weigh us down and burden us, we take it with us (a metaphorical cross to bear) and move forward, creating and reshaping communities for the better. 

The play follows someone rebuilding both their faith and their identity after exclusion. Did any aspects of that journey resonate with you?

CHARLI: It was a deeply personal process, very much rooted in my own experiences growing up Catholic, realizing my identity at a young age, and feeling like I had to completely stuff it down. I drew on a lot of these memories - recalling the feeling of sitting in chapel trying to pray but only able to think about the girl I had a crush on, feeling shame about it, writing about it in my prayer journal…the list goes on. Ultimately, in my own life, it was far more painful to keep this up rather than accept myself the way that I am, so the sister in the play definitely goes through a really similar journey. 

GIULIA: After leaving the Catholic Church myself, I felt lost, because my identity since I was a kid had to do with church and with God and what it meant to be a servant of God. So it resonates with me because now that I’ve left the church I’ve had to rebuild my own beliefs about the world, about who I am, and about what I want. My experience of the church ingrained in me the idea of collective belief but after leaving I had to confront what I actually want in this world and who I am, which is a queer liberated creative artist. 

Why did The Hope Theatre feel like the right venue for this production?

CHARLI: The biggest draw was of course that the Hope Theatre not only accepts queer, femme, and nonbinary voices but also centers and prioritizes them! As soon as I learned about North SapphFest I knew I needed to be a part of it because of how important those parts of my identity are to the work that I do and the stories I want to tell. 

Solo performances foster a uniquely intimate relationship between artist and audience. What do you enjoy about the format of a one woman play and what unique storytelling opportunities does it offer?

GIULIA: From my perspective as the director, it’s a challenge to not only direct the actor in the room but to also make the performance dynamic enough so that the audience believes the character and wants to root for the character. But I enjoy the format for just that reason, because it allows the audience to deep dive into one person’s narrative and perspective, and I think that the storytelling of one narrative actually resonates with individual audience members - maybe it could be them, how do they put themselves in that one person’s shoes?

CHARLI: I really love being able to bring an audience in with me, to have them be the only other people in the room when a character is at their lowest or highest or most pivotal point. It’s an exciting challenge both ways - on my part, to fully commit to honesty and truth in the performance and on the audience’s part, to be present and open to being a part of the story. 

How did you approach navigating the conflict between religion and queerness and how did you want to present this on stage? 

CHARLI: I really wanted to portray many different aspects of a queer narrative, take the audience through all the emotional bumps and pitfalls and peaks that come with coming to terms with a queer identity - which is a unique process for every single queer person. I aimed to be both poetic and direct to highlight the complexities of the conflict, so in terms of performance and staging, I also tried to use varied methods to show how the character moves through the conflict. 

The show places queer voices at the centre of a space they've historically been excluded from. Why do you think reclaiming those spaces through theatre is important?

GIULIA: Because theatre is political. Because theatre offers us a unique environment to push the boundaries of the world outside of the theatre space. Because as theatre makers we have an obligation to make people feel seen and included. By reclaiming those spaces through theatre we are giving people who need it that opportunity to be seen in spaces where they always felt othered.

CHARLI: Reclaiming spaces like this is how we show them they cannot erase us. We have to keep pushing through every door, take our seats at every table, show them that no one has more of a right to exist in one space than any other. And if they continue to exclude us, we will continue to create our own spaces that welcome those they have cast out, without exception. 

The play explores themes of faith, identity, trauma and community. How did you balance these deeply challenging subjects with hope and celebration?

CHARLI: The core thing is that in all of queer history, there unfortunately has always been suffering and grief and hardship. Yet still, we as a community are known for our vibrancy and life and pride in spite of it all. We cannot have joy without grief. I think that the form of the mass lends itself really well to this already. A mass is often called a “celebration,” but its core parts are about the brutal suffering and death of Christ, and yet the main takeaway is the prospect of eternal life, joy, and salvation. I took this idea and decided that instead of just the promise of joy, I would make good on that promise in the moment by inviting the audience into song and ritual and community. 

The production imagines a new kind of church built from the ground up. What does community look like in Makeshift and why was that important to explore?

CHARLI: Community in Makeshift is whatever anyone needs it to be. It is for the people who have been otherwise left behind or made to feel like they do not or cannot belong anywhere. It’s sharing meals, singing together, doing activism together - all the things we do in the show, in the moment.

The show blends theatrical storytelling with elements of ritual and performance. What opportunities did that hybrid form offer you creatively?

GIULIA: Creatively this hybrid form offers a chance for the audience to be not just witnesses but also active participants. It’s not just a performance. Ritual transcends performance because it allows for audiences to actively connect, make active choices, keeps them engaged and gives them a stake in the performance. It also means that audiences are coming into a real experience. There isn’t a disconnect between actor and spectator. The actor is more of a host than just a performer. 

How do you see theatre contributing to conversations around inclusion and social change?

CHARLI: Again, I think the fact that there are enough (and definitely more) stories about queer women, nonbinary folx, and other marginalized voices to make a whole theatre festival out of it is a testament to how needed these conversations really are. It would be amazing to see more theatres highlighting these stories more regularly, not just as one-offs but as a feature of their programming. 

Was there anything you discovered through developing the show that surprised you or changed your own perspective?

CHARLI: In the first iteration of the piece there was one part where I pretty decidedly denounce prayer, but once I brought Giulia on to direct, this was one of the first things she really challenged me on, and challenged me to explore another way of talking about prayer rather than shutting it down completely. Throughout the process my perspective really changed - prayer isn’t meant to be a stand in or replacement for action, and it isn’t the opposite of action either. Prayer - specifically, the type of intercessory prayer that reflects on groups that are suffering - is a way that we can set intentions which then lead us to act. We can be both reflective and active; they aren’t mutually exclusive. Also, prayer isn’t only religious - prayer is anything that we hope for, that we dream of, that we want to manifest. So, taking it in that context, prayer isn’t something that is only linked to the church for me anymore - it’s just altogether very human to turn our thoughts, hopes, and dreams inward. 

How has working on this production influenced your own understanding of spirituality, belief or community?

CHARLI: I don’t consider myself religious anymore but religion was such a huge part of my life for so long (I went to Catholic school from the ages of 3 to 21) that it’s hard for me to completely shed all of those beliefs. I don’t think I can say I’m an atheist or even agnostic, I think that I am still very spiritual and connected to certain beliefs and to the idea that common beliefs create communities, but through this process I have definitely become much more aware of how harmful powerful institutions like the Catholic church can be to people who are vulnerable. 

You intend for the play not only to tell a story, but to create something resembling a shared ritual. How have you approached building that relationship with the audience?

CHARLI: I think by making shared joy the only real expectation for the ritual elements takes a lot of pressure off the audience, and also off of myself as the performer. There is no higher power here, no worry that the ritual is going to be done wrong, it’s just about being there together and doing something together. 

Audience members will have very different relationships with religion, whether positive, negative or somewhere in between. What conversations do you hope the play encourages?

CHARLI: I genuinely hope that audiences take with them that what Jesus actually taught is what every one of us should hope to show to other people and to receive from others - kindness, tenderness, love, care, peace, healing, all offered unconditionally - and to offer this out to anyone who needs it. These things do not have to be religious in any way; they just call us to be good to each other, which we don’t need any church to tell us. And I hope audiences will feel encouraged to speak out against those who would twist these teachings so that they can be weaponized.

What has been the most rewarding or most challenging part of bringing this story to life?

CHARLI: It’s definitely a big undertaking, to do such an emotionally intense show as a solo performer, especially as it is so close to my own story (on purpose). It has required me to have a much deeper awareness of myself physically, mentally, and emotionally, and to be really disciplined with how I spend my time outside of the rehearsal room. But at the same time it has been so rewarding - it’s incredibly cathartic and therapeutic to be able to dissect and explore my own identity through my own art form. And to do it alongside Giulia, who is not only an incredible director but also a close friend, is even more of a gift. 

GIULIA: The most rewarding thing is being able to see a written piece evolve in the room as something that is fluid. Charli and I can’t always control where it’s going and that is exciting for me. It’s almost like you’re birthing a child. The most challenging thing is the question of how I as a director can keep the audience surprised and the actor engaged. 

Looking ahead, what are your hopes for the future of Makeshift and what ambitions do you have for your own careers as artists and theatre-makers?

CHARLI: It’s been such a joy to work on this and I think I would really like to continue developing it further as a piece. But I also genuinely hope that the piece launches a real community and a space (whether real/in person or on social media) for queer people and allies to talk about their experiences with religion, to offer support to one another, and to take part in real activism.